Like my photo

Five likes and steadily climbing
Usually I'll only get three
But no matter how far this thing goes
Only one like matters to me

Twelve likes in twenty minutes
Perhaps this is starting to spiral
Believe me, I know my limits
But to me twelve likes is, like, viral.

Only three more likes since two thirty
It seems to be slowing down
I must find a better way to be flirty
Than just hoping you'll be around.

Hoping you'll happen to see
Maybe flicking through on your phone, with your tea,
Hoping it will make you smile
When you come across a picture of me

Hoping that before you scroll down
Or click on that spurious link
You're watching your finger hovering over the thumb
beneath the dumb pic of me, with a wink

You liked that picture of a kitten
You liked that cheesy internet meme
So wont you click on the person that's smitten
Who is worth at least ten of them

Well, maybe just nine and a half
Okay, a seven or eight
Alright, a very decent six
Now click and stop making me wait

Now I've maxed out with like twenty six
And it's not even a profile pic
And you've gone and liked someone much younger than me
And I think I feel physically sick

You liked your friends post
Of a hunk who is stripped to the waist
A tanned hunk with a ripped torso
While I'm fat and more pasty of face

If you wont give me something to go on,
"What chance is there of us getting together,
If you wont like my pic quick, and so on,
I fear the answer is 'never'.

I checked out your profile a few times
I scrolled through your list of likes
Some two hundred and thirty seven
Including some dodgy web sites

You liked a million giraffes
And forgive me, I don't mean to scoff
You liked the Kings of Leon
AND You liked Ferris Beullers day off

So if you can be so dualistic
And have taste that's both good and bad
Can't you please just like one photo
Of someone who's closer in age to your dad

I want you to like my photo
I want you to like my face, you see
I want you to see past what I look like
I suppose I just want you to like me

You see, although I barely know you to speak to
I think you shine in all that you do.
You look simultaneously like home and adventure, to me
And I think that I simply...
Like you.

I think you're the bees knees, now, honey
I think you're sweeter than Jam
And I kind of get the feeling
For a taste, I'd give all that I am,

I'm sounding increasingly desperate,
So please save me from my misery,
I don't care if you don't like my photo
Just as long as you actually...
Like me.

Twenty six likes and no longer climbing
Usually I'll only get three
But no matter how well this one has gone
Only one like matters to me